Day 11: Fear Thrives In Dark Corners
Fear is like poisonous fungi in our minds. It thrives in dark corners where we never bother to look and feeds on vagueness, generalisations and myth.
Listen to the audio, then do the journaling activity below.
Results from the Go-Getter Quiz show that only 11% of women ever tell other people about their goals.
So, 89% of women have a fear of telling other people about their goals. They fear losing face or feeling humiliated if they don’t achieve them.
That is very strange behaviour!
Telling people about your goals is a brilliant way to start bringing that goal to life and pressure-testing it. It gives you the opportunity to learn from others by drawing on their knowledge.
Most goals are never achieved. The point of a goal is to have a destination that takes you on a learning journey. Often, the goal becomes redundant during the learning.
Ask that 89% why they haven’t chased their wild adventure idea before, and they’re likely to say it’s their fear of failure getting in the way.
“Fear of failure” is a broad and inaccurate description of what’s actually going on. It’s impossible to conquer that fear because it’s vague and wide-reaching.
But, if we accurately define the fear present, then we can do something about it. Point out to one of those 89%ers that they have a fear of telling people about their goals, and they will either:
Have a laugh at how trivial that is as a fear, and start telling you their goals
OR
They will just start telling you their goals and never again fear doing it.
Fear is like poisonous fungi in our minds. It thrives in dark corners where we never bother to look and feeds on vagueness, generalisations and myth.
When we shine a light on fear, in most instances, it withers away. I often say that fear is like a vampire when it hits sunlight – POOF! – it disintegrates into a pile of dust.
Over the last few days, you have been learning methods for shining a light on your fears. Today’s tool was the clincher when I busted free from my own cycle of self-doubt.
The sharp definition of fear diminishes its power; every distinction you make will chip away at it. The fear will go from being big and intimidating to manageable and then non-existent.
Today’s journaling…
Look back through the fears that you have identified during the past few days…
What finer definitions/distinctions can you make about those?
In your journal, write down those finer details.
Again, stay away from judging or problem-solving what you write. At the moment, we just want to witness it, i.e. see it for what it is.